Personal Entries

I’m glad I’m not a duck

Things Karen has said recently:


“I saw a woman today who I desperately wanted to take bra shopping.  Katie, her breasts were down to her elbows.  It made me sad.  It made me want to go over and adjust her bra straps. If I lived in the northeast I’d be adjusting stranger’s bras all over the place.”


“You’re always so shocked by how dark your hair is, and then you worry that it looks fake.  You don’t ever worry that anything else looks so good it looks fake.  I’ve never once heard you say, ‘My breasts are so perky that everyone thinks they’re fake.  I’m going to start strapping them down.’  You never say that.”


“I read something very disturbing today.  About ducks.  Did you know that male ducks have corkscrew-shaped penises?! And, the female ducks have corkscrew-shaped vaginas, but the corkscrew goes the other way.  In fact, duck vaginas are quite complicated with extra twists and turns and even dead ends.  I’m glad I’m not a duck.”

“You know I’m going to write about this, right?”

“Don’t say I just  started talking about duck penises!  You have to say what led up to it.”

“You did just start talking about duck penises!”

“Oh.  Oh…….I guess I did.”


11 thoughts on “I’m glad I’m not a duck

  1. “…bra straps”
    “…so good it looks fake”
    “…corkscrew-shaped penises”

    Now I know where to find GREAT entertainment.
    LOVE IT!
    Want to come over for a cup of coffee???

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