Personal Entries

A sock on his thing

The boys and their friends are watching music videos on YouTube,  our neighbor Dylon pulling up videos of the songs he’s recently learned to play on his guitar.

“We should start a band!  Can I learn to play the drums?”  Matt asks me.  “I’ll be the drummer!”

“No,” says Riley, “I want the drums!  Then I can dress like the drummer in the Red Hot Chili Peppers!”

Huh.  As far as I know the drummer for the Chili Peppers dresses normally.  But, I also know how very impressed Riley was to learn that the Chili Peppers have performed live wearing practically nothing.  He’s also impressed by No Doubt’s drummer, who often wears faux fur thongs while performing.  I wonder if these rock legends (perhaps mixed with thoughts of Animal from The Muppet Show),  have combined in his mind to create one Super Badass Drummer who wears….not much.  Whatever the image in his mind,  it’s impressive enough to make him think drums are the only way to go.

“OK,”  Matt agrees, “I’ll be the bass player then,  but who’ll sing ‘shoop, shoop’ in the background?”

“We need girls for that.”  Dylon says this with authority.  He knows what it takes to make a good band, man.

“Oh!” I say, “Miss Jill and I can be the ‘shoop, shoop” girls!”  I demonstrate my best hip swaying, slightly bored-looking shoop, shoop.  It’s pretty impressive.

Riley agrees to Jill and I being the shoop, shoop girls, with one caveat: “But you and Miss Jill can’t dress sexy, because that would just be weird.”

“Honey, Miss Jill and I can’t help our innate sexiness, and you just have to accept it.  And no one would even know we were your mothers!”

“Yes they would!  Because when I’m drumming all I’ll wear is a sock on my thing, and if you’re there you’ll say, Riley Stein! Put on some pants! That’s inappropriate!  You can’t wear a sock on your thing!”

“That’s what I’d say about you wearing a sock on your thing?” I ask.

“Yeah,” says Ri. “You wouldn’t like it.”


5 thoughts on “A sock on his thing

  1. Ri, OF COURSE, ONLY A SOCK ON YOUR THING is UNACCEPTABLE!!!!!! Get real. Put on your pants and play football (soccer to you, my all-merican kid). See ya in Barcelona -kickin’ you know what!

    Love ya, Ri-guy

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