Poison ivy is popping up in places that just should not ever have been exposed to poison ivy unless I was weeding the flowerbeds at the nudist colony, and then enjoyed a full body massage with Sven while he wore gloves made from leaves of three. And it seems that after my afternoon of nudist gardening and massage I must have dipped a Q-tip into some Eu de Ivy and stuck it in my right ear.
And I noticed the tube of Benedryl Karen gave me expired 05/00. I don’t think it’s working.
Dr. Katie thinks wine might help.
But seriously, how did I get this all over me?